Swimsuits and Authenticity

Saturday, June 28, 2008

I, as many of you, have spent the last several months preparing for summer...the dreaded swimsuit season. Staring at my reflection, picking a part my "flaws", so that I knew just what to work on so that when I revealed myself half naked I would be accepted.

Before attending a co-ed event at the lake my senior year of college I was having major insecurity since two of the girls attending had just finished competing in Miss Alabama the week before. Bryan asked me why I was so worried and the truth that left my lips surprised even me. I told him it was because I was being vulnerable with myself in front of a lot of people I didn't know.

I can cover my body and wear the right clothes to make certain areas look smaller, bigger, flatter, etc. I can disguise my body with clothes and make my reflection acceptable. However, stepping into that swimsuit means that everything I have covered up all year is now out in the open. I can't hide any longer, I must reveal to people what my body truly looks like.

Community/Authenticity is just like this. We try to cover our true selves up, our flaws, sins, things that might bring criticism, by not being authentic. We don't want to be naked for fear of being rejected.

However, as this summer has approached and settled in I have been daily reminded of the freedom that comes with vulnerability/authenticity. I am still loved and accepted by friends and family no matter how much my body has changed or looks in a swimsuit; just as I am accepted by those some friends and family when I am willing to be spiritually naked with them.

My figure isn't perfect and neither am I; but the freedom that comes from being naked with those close to me is far more valuable than

Summer of Tests

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Well it appears I am going to have to take and pass one more test before I can be fully ready to take the teaching position next year! I thought this summer was going to be a break from school, but its back to the books for me. I am still waiting on my scores from the first test...they should be here in about two weeks. Any prayers for divine intervention during the scoring would be welcomed =). I don't feel great about certain parts! Well I guess I should go enjoy the rest of my day before I have to start studying again next week.

Friday the 13th

Saturday, June 14, 2008

For the second time in my life, it happened again. My birthday was yesterday, Friday the 13th.

Growing up my mom and family always made birthdays really special. As I have gotten older, I still enjoy them, but i'm not real big on the celebration. Mind you, I still love me some birthday cake/dessert and any gifts wanted to be given =) Giving gifts is definitely one of my love languages, however its not my primary way to receive love. I did not receive one gift yesterday(in a box, etc.) and it was a birthday that I will not soon forget.

Yesterday I received a lot of quality time(my primary receiving love language), the best gift anyone could give me.

Two of my dearest friends started my birthday morning off with a wonderful breakfast at Chick-fil-A and then we went and walked around some new houses we had wanted to see for awhile!

Bryan cleaned the house for me and then rescued me from studying to take me to lunch and let me window shop at the outlet(his favorite thing to do of course)

We headed over to Beth and Buck's for our first summer swim and grilled out with David and Farah and the boys. Beth made me a special birthday dessert that was to die for! And my friends were nice enough to take it easy on me and let me take them down on Wii Boxing(ok maybe they didn't go easy on me, i'm just that good)

My parents and brother are coming to visit tomorrow and two other friends are hopefully coming next weekend!!

Thanks everyone it was a great Friday the 13th Birthday!